[Image description: tweet that reads “In 1400 the dog of a murdered man dueled a man it ‘accused’ of being the murderer.” Attached is a photo of text from a book, describing the incident; transcription follows.]
In France, a splendid duel was fought in 1400 between a suspected murderer and his accuser, a dog. The Chevalier Maquer killed Aubrey de Montdidier in the Forest of Bondy, near Paris, and buried the body. The only witness was Montdidier’s greyhound. The dog went back to town to a friend of his master’s and led the friend to the spot, where he whined and scratched the ground. The body was recovered and reburied, and the greyhound moved in with the friend. Shortly thereafter, it met up with Maquer and attacked him viciously; three men had to pull it off him. The dog was an otherwise gentle and amiable sort, but it kept on flying at Maquer whenever it saw him.
This was reported to the king, who decided it was definitely an accusation and arranged for the single-combat trial. The fight took place on [the Isle of Notre Dame in Paris,] Maquer with a lance, the greyhound with its natural weapons. The dog sprang on the man with amazing ferocity and clamped its teeth around his throat and couldn’t be shaken off. Maquer screamed that he’d confess if they’d pull off the dog.
This, in contemporary eyes, proved the justice of combat trials pretty conclusively, and Maquer was hanged and strangled on the gibbet at Montfaucon.
Everyone thought that the mass-production of Firearms would render Magic obsolete in battle, but Spellcasters have adapted. Instead of casting from a wand, most mages now cast from their gun.
I think the most humiliating object in the world is the Fleshlight sleeve warmer
Its only purpose is to slide into your fleshlight and get it to body temp. It’s $30. I want to get every single man who owns one of these into one room and make them do long-form improv
Jail!
Different Jail!
i thought this was the bottom half of those one office chairs
Deadass looks like some medieval torture device
Advanced sounding device
Power squat dildo
i thought it was the bottom of an office chair as well and it took me back to formative image i saw on /b/ i wish i’d saved as i’ve never found it again even on gelbooru